“It is like pumping blood to the little heart inside you. It is like passing air to the little lungs. It is like loving the unknown with all your heart and soul. This is what being mommy is.”
In country like India and family like mine (upper middle class) parents tend to take all tension for their daughter’s marriage and as soon as the vermilion appears on her head, parents tension deviates from marriage to the grandchildren. I got married at the age of 29, in a perfect arranged marriage scenario. And by the time I learnt to put a perfect straight line of vermilion on my head, I was expected to give the good news!!
I am a Journalist, professionally and mentally. So, prior to marriage i remained busy in political news coverage, war reporting and so many other things and whenever i get leisure time, I use to spend it sleeping. Sleeping for hours. But after marriage the scenario changed completely, my priority shifted from Career-Work-News to Family-Work-Family. Being an ideal Indian Bahu, became my new KRA. But achieving this KRA is not an easy task. Life after marriage is not a cake walk, trust me. Similarly, for me, it was difficult rather very difficult to get accustomed with all the changes. Mentality, routine, habits, thinking, the way I dress up (!!!) and lot more things. I took months to get settled in my new family. But Yes, I did it.
Once I got settled in my new world, began the never-ending discussion of family planning. Like every other couple we were in Dilemma to plan a baby now or later. Several questioned cropped in our mind, what is the right time? What about my Journalism career if I plan a baby right away? What about our saving for the new addition in family? Is my body ready for all the changes? If not now then when? We spend many nights discussing ‘now or later’ and finally decided to plan it now(!). Why? Because our heart told us to plan it right away! (4 months after marriage). We decide to have baby as we thought baby will add more color
to our relationship. Baby will strengthen our bond. And believe me IT DID. You will not realize it initially but once u will get your bundle of joy, u will experience that your relationship has reached a new level.
The good news!
Ironically rather fortunately, the aashirvad of ‘Doodho nahao puto Phalo’, worked perfectly in me and my husband’s case and soon we were all set on our family way. I remember it was the month of November when the cool morning breeze and the two lines on the Prega-stripe made us the happiest couple. Few initial blood tests and we were sure that we are on our family way. We shared the good news with both the families. The news was like the best thing ever happened to them. Everyone was on cloud 9. Though we were happy as well but I guess our happiness was still few steps behind than that of our parents.
Now or later, you will have to plan it. You will have to take a break from everything. And trust me, the feeling of being mommy is worth sacrificing your work for a while. Its worth taking a break from everything. Moreover, If you have the will and passion you can always resume your career.
Then came my first trimester… first visit to doctor… first USG… first look of the life inside me…the Chinese calendar… and a lot more in my next blog. Stay tuned!!!